Hello? Anybody there?
Yes, I'm back and glad to be posting again.
The past two months were good. I also received some not very good news from home. I've been wanting to talk to you about the good things, about the books I've read, things I've done and most of all, about writing. But I can't. Not tonight. My mind is just filled with thoughts about home. Don't get me wrong, I love it here, living in the countryside with my husband and son. England is also home for me now. But a bit of my heart has stayed in my mother country, the Philippines.
When I moved to England more than six years ago, I knew I was leaving not only my family and friends but also my childhood, places I've been, schools I went to - I can go on and on. By then, I already had friends who had left themselves, including my best friend, Rachel, who left when I was still in the university, if my memory serves me right.
In the past six years, there were birthdays, anniversaries, graduations and all that kind of thing that I couldn't be part of. It is sad to even think about it but believe it or not, when there is good news, inside of me, I am celebrating with them.
There were moments of sadness and grief that I never wished for any of my friends and loved ones to experience and I had hoped that when those moments would inevitably come, I'd be there. But I am away. I couldn't offer a comforting presence. This is the problem when life takes us away to be someplace else.
Luckily for us in this day and age, we have technology. We rely on the benefits of the internet to communicate. But the truth hurts. Because we all know it isn't enough. There is always something missing. The internet or the telephone will never be able to replace the warmth of an embrace between two human beings. It will never be a substitute for the feel of the fingers wiping tears away when you are down and out.
Perhaps one day, I will be able to go back and see my family and friends again. Feel their arms around me once again. For now, internet will have to be enough. It will have to do.
Has it already been 6 years? My goodness. Time flies! I feel you sis. The downside of living away from our mother country. Thank goodness for technology. It somehow eases the pain of being away. Back when I was in Philippines and my mum was working in the Middle East we had to rely on snail mail and recorded voice tapes! Cheer up sis. *big hug*
ReplyDeleteGlad to hear from you! :)
DeleteOh, Len. I hear you. I've been in England for eight years now and while it's now my home, it will never truly be HOME. My heart is still tied to Canada, to all my friends and family there. You feel the distance more keenly when something emotional happens and you can't be there physically.
ReplyDeleteHugs, hugs, hugs.
It's awful when you hear them over the phone and there's so much sadness. I just feel like flying back!
Deletehello Len!! Welcome back!! I hope you see your childhood friends and relations soon too!! It's good to keep memories alive! Take care and have a great Sunday!
ReplyDeletex
Kitty, thanks so much. x
DeleteHi Len! I know exactly how you feel. And I just got back from a month & a half vacation from the motherland. It does gets harder & harder everytime to come back to my second home. Hope to talk to you again soon. It's been a long time.
ReplyDeleteWow. A month and a half! You have to tell me how it is there when we get the chance for a chat :) Hugs.
DeleteHi Len .. I understand what you're saying .. I always feel sorry for a care worker/nurse if a member of their family becomes ill and they can't get back home - and especially when I'm up with my mother everyday as her time runs out .. I appreciate the carers' and nurses' support through these times.
ReplyDeleteWith thoughts .. and am glad to hear your 2 months off had some good times - cheers Hilary
Thanks, Hilary.
DeleteLen, my heart goes out to you, and I do so understand your pain of distance from home. May your days be bright and full of great writerly things! X
ReplyDeleteI'm working on the edits for Real Women, Real Stories, Glynis...it takes my mind away from worries. I'm feeling a lot better today. Thank you. x
DeleteOh, Len, I'm sorry you miss home. I wish you could afford to visit there all the time, which would help a lot, I'm sure. I can't imagine what it's like to move to a new country. It was enough of a transition for me to move a few states away. I hope you can visit soon. xo
ReplyDeleteI've been wishing I could afford to invite my family over, too. Thanks for the lovely comment, Theresa.
DeleteOh, I'm sure they'd love that. How amazing would that be for you to be the expert of the place you live!
DeleteYes still here Len, that month went quickly. I am sorry to read this post as it also makes me feel a little sadder than I already do this morning, having heard news from the UK. I also wanted to be somewhere I am not to be able to give a friend more than a virtual hug. :) Thank goodness for modern means of communication. Take Care Len.
ReplyDeleteA big hug Len. Having friends and family on three continents, I can relate.
ReplyDeleteBig Hug back, A.
DeleteDo let me know if my previous comment got lost Len,or maybe you have just not approved it yet?
ReplyDeleteHi Lindy...I usually get notified via email when I receive new comments...for some reasons, blogger didn't send me any notification for the last 3 messages. Thanks for your lovely comment. Hugs.
DeleteHello Len. Long time no see on blog! And you have a bright shiny new one. Everyone seems to be building a new blog. What have I missed? Should I be moving my blog too? Tell me why?? I've followed you here and look forward to your posts.
ReplyDeleteMy son is heading to the Phillipines for a holiday and to meet friends. Leaves this Sunday. I hope he has a good experience. Scary for mum though.
It sounds like you've had a lot going on. Hope you're settling and feeling better.
I see by your comment on Michael di Gesu's blog you're a romantic. Well, I'm looking for readers over at RomanticFridayWriters. As my link is to L'Aussie, I'm not getting many people stopping by RFW (we are on hiatus too but I decided to post flash fiction every day to keep my hand in). I hate to be writing to myself every day, well, nearly!
Have a great day Len! Catch you later, wherever! My blogger childhood profiles are going down well on L'Aussie too.
Denise
If the spirit moves you...
http://romanticfridaywriters.blogspot.com
Hi Denise! I've been to your blog and loved your flash fiction :) I was able to leave a message today - I tried last night but couldn't get through for some reason.
DeleteI've explained why I changed my blog in a post. This will be easier for people to find me because my name is on the URL. Thank you for coming over :)
I hope your son enjoys his holiday! I'm sure he will be alright and if he's with friends and people he knows in the country, it's a lot better :)
I feel you...most of my family lives in England. The rest of them live in the southern part of the US...I'm living almost in Minnesota. It's hard, but you have to focus on the future and appreciate the times you do get to see each other or talk on the phone or chat on the computer.
ReplyDeleteLen, hope you are feeling better now. I do understand the feeling of being so far away from people we can cry to. sending you my virtual hugs.
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry, Len. I know what it's like to be far away and to feel so helpless. I hope that you are finding peace and healing in the passage of time. I'm sure that your family and friends back home feel your love, even from such a distance.
ReplyDelete